I had experience with a relative who was diagnosed as bi-polar.  It was an extremely difficult situation because she self-medicated with diet pills, pot, liquor and in her last years, "Crank". We never really knew for sure whether she was bi-polar or whether her bi-polar behavior was a result of drug abuse, causing a psychotic reaction.*Because she was never "sober" long enough to know for sure.   This is  very common.  Often,  people who suffer from various mental disorders also abuse alcohol or drugs so it can be difficult to know for sure which came first.  Anyway, whether this is the case with your husband or not, you can't manage this alone.  You cannot help him, except to get him professional help.  One of the most discouraging and frustrating things about people with these disorders is that they refuse to stay on their medication.  They don't  like the "straight line" feeling that medication causes.  They like  that "high" feeling that comes during the manic phase, but then they get too high and that throws them out of control and they nosedive.  This was our experience with my sister.  There are many degrees of bi-polar.  Some people are high functioning and can hold a steady job, be good parents, etc.  But others are severely affected by the disorder.  The way you describe your husband  he sounds as though his aggressive behavior could escalate to a very dangerous level.  If you do not have children in the home, good.  Keep it that way.  If you do have children who are affected by his illness, you may have to divorce him. Or remove the kids from the home to a safe place.  Once a manic "crash" is over, the person often has a "new lease on life" and seems determined to get better and stay better.  This is a sincere belief, but it doesn't last because that "fresh start" attitude is also a part of the disorder.  Your situation may not be like ours was, only you can say.  But if your husband has not been evaluated by a specialist in this field that is the first thing you need to do. (We saw several specialists before we found a really good one.)  He may require in-patient treatment at a residential facility. If he is not willing to get the treatment a specialist prescribes,  you may have to pull away from him as hard as that is.  But whatever you do, don't delude yourself into believing that your love, patience and support can "cure" him or make him well.  IT WILL NOT. Whatever the outcome, It is not your fault and it's not your responsibility.  I wish you the very best and I hope that I've said something that resonates with you.  God Bless.